horse woman and her shoulder
Hi, this is my first time posting. Today is March 25, 2010 and 5 weeks ago I had rotator cuff repair. All two tendons were restructured and little clips were put into the bone. Bone was shaved in 2 areas. The tendon for my bicep was so shredded that it had to be removed- something I was told my Dr- who is a STAR ortho guy has not had to do before.
So my artho and ortho surgery turned into a little scar and a big one- and the worst pain I have ever experienced.
Now I am a professional horsewoman, I ride and train, used to show and am pretty known and have some big horses, friesians who I breed and ride and show to people to allow them to see how magnificent they are.
Several months ago I was lifting my western saddle and felt this ripping in my right shoulder, knocked me to my knees and I cried for 20 minutes.
I am not a sissy- horse girls have ugly toes from being crushed by big hooves, have broken ribs and much more and so we are pretty stoic.
Between ignoring the *pulled muscle and the dr and exrays which showed nothing much, the mri and the cat scan and finally the surgery was 8 months of riding.
The first clue was the block which wore off in 4.5 hrs and the morphine which was not even close to doing its thing.
2 days in Hospital and I want to die, cant sleep or eat or think I am in such pain until my interneist ups my morphine enough for me to get out of the hospital.
armed with 50 10mg percoset and 50 norco same 10 mg I am home and wishing to take back the last 3 days and re do over no surgery.
My husband stays home with me- we have dogs and cats and the horses- so he is doing it all.
I cannot think I am in such agony.
Now allow me to say in 1994 I was in a car accident- a rear end hit that broke my back in 4 places and my neck so I know surgery- 9.5 hrs for the back and 3 for the neck and between both a halo for 9 months and a full body cast for 1 yr.
add to this a horse exploding in Hawaii while I was teaching there in 2004,and my right hip breaking all the way down the femur- and I stayed on that horse and in 2005 had a total hip replacement..
anyway this is so bad it is horrid to me.
Now it is 5 weks later, and I start rehab tomorrow and still am on 2 norco every night.
new prescriptions by now.
and I have been on Kadian 10 mg for over one yr to deal with the lower back discs that are crushing nerves the bi lateral bask titanium cages are in place of verterbrea for.
epidurals did not work for a day so kadian was prescribed- once a day. So all my pain helping endorphins head to the back and neck with the kadian and it has made me 100 times more aware of any new pain and now I have nothing to deal with pain woth--no stoic behavior, no strength of character, nothing,
but chemistry.
I have 3 mares in foal, and a lovely stallion who is active. I still work him but I do not ride him and he knows I am in pain - they all know even the silly kittens- so they are all very sweet and soft around me.
In the last week a new sound has arisen- it is a click noise like when you r bone is against a tendon and it is slipping or something.
and then it hurts and of course my gorgeous biceps- which women who ride and have saddles and big horses always have - is now upside down looking.
I don't care about that- it is this nagging pain this never stopping burn and then this click that hAPPENS when i move the shoulder/arm some way.. and then the pain is like new for 5 seconds.
Beyond that I have no problem lifting my hand arm up over my head, no frozen shoulder, can do the spiders and drive my deisel and whatever- cant even think of picking up a qt of milk with my right hand- and I am a lefty.
I know I need patience- I know I need to heal. WHAT is this clicking???? I am so scared I will need to have something fixed, I am soooo damn scared.,
and fwiw I need rcs on my left shoulder and guess what- no way- I wouldn't go thru this much pain unless I can be put in a coma for 45 days and guarentee to lose the 10 lbs I have gained since I stopped riding.
Ok , at least here you all understand, and for those who have not fallen asleep reading this, thank you.
Have a good night.
susie
aka
blckhrsqstrn
